Notting Hill

BLIND DATE (Emma Bernard): I’m a fruitarian.
WILL (Hugh Grant): And, um, what exactly is a fruitarian?
BLIND DATE: We believe fruits and vegetables have feelings so we think cooking is cruel. We only eat things that have actually fallen off a tree or bush – that are, in fact, dead already.
WILL: Right… right. Interesting stuff. So these carrots…?
BLIND DATE: Have been murdered, yes.
WILL: Murdered? Poor carrots. How beastly.

For some inexplicable reason, the above quote in particular seems to come up quite often in conversation, where it is always endlessly funny. Must be something to do with those murdered carrots, poor things. Or the word “beastly.” (ah, British words) Or, um, the wine we’ve had with dinner. Whichever.

MARTIN (James Dreyfus): Did you know, and this is pretty amazing, but I once saw Ringo Starr.
WILL: Where was that?
MARTIN: Kensington High Street. At least I think it was Ringo… um, it could have been that guy from Fiddler on the Roof. You know, Toppy.
WILL: Topol.
MARTIN: Yes, yes… that’s right, Topol.
WILL: Um, actually, Ringo Starr doesn’t look at all like Topol.
MARTIN: Yes, but he was – he was quite a long way away from me.
WILL: So it actually could’ve been neither of them?
MARTIN: …yes, I suppose so.
WILL: It’s not really a classic anecdote, is it?
MARTIN: Not a classic, no.


4 Responses to Quotes

  1. Arti says:

    These are hilarious quotes! I was in Kensington High Street recently and I didn’t see anybody…maybe I did see somebody but s/he was just too far away for me to recognize…Anyway, more quotes please?

  2. Thomson says:

    Thomson says : I absolutely agree with this !

  3. […] help? Or is she genuinely concerned for the safety of veggies everywhere? Does she want to become a fruitarian? I have a feeling only she will know – so maybe this will need to be a 2 part blog. If you care, I […]

  4. Spit says:

    …James Bond never had to put up with this sh*t…:-)

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